Grief As I Know It

Jandy Chambers

Death. That is a frightening word for all of us. Death of our loved ones and family is a thought we'd rather avoid. Yet it happens. Everyone dies, including those close to us. This small book was written from a personal viewpoint to help others deal with grief.

The author had five family members die in less than three years. There had been division in her family, but those relationships started being repaired. Those who remained were able to get past the hurt and separation and accept each other as they were. Death helped bring together those who are still alive.

The author tells her story in the first part of the book, then goes on to coping. It is a compassionate common sense book, telling the reader it is normal to grieve, to feel sad, to have conflicting emotions, and to have emotions that recur for years. She does not try to minimize grief, but instead counsels to accept it and keep going.

For once I am glad to say that I did not read this book to address an immediate need in my life. This is one I was requested to read and review for this web page. I read through this agreeing with most of what I read, although our theology and faith differ. I also found this very helpful as the friend of a woman who recently lost her husband and another who lost her father not too long ago. I believe I knew the concepts included here. This reinforced how I could be there to help them.

While this book is written to help people in their grief over the loss of a loved one, I think it is beneficial for any adult. Someone around us will die. Reading this book before can help prepare us. It can help us help a friend. Reading this book after a close death will be very difficult, especially immediately after the death. But that is because we tend to avoid the subject. When able to read it, the living person will find compassionate, practical ideas on how to keep on with life.

This book would be beneficial on the shelf of anyone who deals with grief counseling. It is small, not sermonizing, and easy to read. The writer can empathize with those who have lost friends and family. It does not try to get the reader past the grief, just gives ways for the reader to cope with it.

(One reason Grief As I Know It came to my attention is because the author's name really is Jandy. Mine is an on-line name. Hers is her real life name. She can be reached through her website at www.jandyc.com.) (link checked 9/09)